The Sunday Mail
In his famous book “The Trouble with Nigeria”, Chinua Achebe professes that the only trouble with Nigeria is the failure of leadership, because with good leaders Nigeria could resolve its inherent problems such as tribalism; lack of patriotism; social injustice and the cult of mediocrity; indiscipline; and corruption.
Vhukani Madoda – The Sharp Shooter
I am particularly interested in the indiscipline aspect.
The trouble with fly-by-night rabble-rousers such as Adeola Fayehun is that they are fundamentally ill-bred and someone in Nigeria is to blame for such a disgraceful and boorish daughter whose malady echoes the false democracy that permeates throughout that Boko Haram-ridden country.
Why the leaders and elders of Nigeria saw it fit to allow such a misfit within five yards of the Chair of the entire African Union stinks to high heavens. How on Earth could Nigerian leaders and elders let such a wild cat out of the bag on an important day such as the inauguration of their president?
Nigeria and its leaders bitterly exposed themselves by holding on fast to what their sage Achebe rebuked them for — harbouring a false image of self — when he said, “One of the commonest manifestations of underdevelopment is the tendency amongst the ruling elite to live in a world of make-believe and unrealistic expectation.
“This is the cargo cult mentality that anthropologists sometimes speak about — a belief by backward people that someday, without any exertion whatsoever on their own part, a fairy ship will dock in their harbour laden with every goody they have always dreamed of possessing.
“Listen to Nigerian leaders and you will frequently hear the phrase: ‘this great nation of ours’.
“Nigeria is not a great country. It is one of the most disorderly nations in the world. It is one of the most corrupt, insensitive, inefficient places under the sun. It is one of the most expensive countries and one of those that give least value for money. It is dirty, callous, noisy, ostentatious, dishonest and vulgar.
“In short, it is among the most unpleasant places on earth! It is a measure of self-delusion that we can talk about developing tourism in Nigeria. Only a masochist with the exuberant taste for self-violence will pick Nigeria for a holiday; only a character out of Tutuola seeking to know punishment and poverty at first hand! No, Nigeria may be a paradise for adventurers and pirates but not for tourists.”
It was as if Achebe was speaking of Nigeria in 2015 at President Buhari’s inauguration. It was as if Achebe was in a prescient manner apologetic for President Mugabe’s misfortune of venturing to President Buhari’s inauguration.
It was as if Achebe knew Nigeria would unleash a vulgar and obscene Adeola Fayehun in President Mugabe’s path.
Born of Nigerian parents, the renowned novelist and critic addressed Nigeria’s problems in his 1983 political commentary “The Trouble with Nigeria”, which every African with political ambitions must take time to read.
Achebe’s aim was to challenge the Nigeria leadership to take responsibility and to inspire Nigerians to reject old habits that them from becoming a modern and attractive country.
Thirty-two years later, however, Nigeria still has a false sense of democracy.
If only they had people like President Mugabe they would not have let a rogue zealot such as Adeola Fayehun misdirecting her frustrations over living in Africa’s largest oil producer but having to queue for fuel.
If only they had people like President Mugabe they would not wallow in a false democracy which makes them unable to feed themselves from their natural resources.
If only they had people like President Mugabe they would not have had insurgent militants in the mould of Boko Haram raping, killing and mutilating innocent citizens as if freedom of religion is an alien concept.
So Adeola Fayehun, to answer your questions in the order that you asked them: no, it is not time for President Mugabe to step down because he was only elected into office on July 31, 2013; yes, he will remain in power until the next elections in 2018 because the term limit is five years; yes, his health is fantastic as you could see for yourself, he is feeling as fit as a fiddle; no, it is not time for him to step down; no, he will not say anything to you because your questions were not only unpolished but unintelligent; yes, change is always happening in Zimbabwe but not of the Boko Haram and oil barons variety; yes, there is democracy in Zimbabwe.
True democracy and false democracy Adeola Fayehun; that is the sad difference.
Oh, and as for your last “question”, what President Mugabe did witness in Nigeria was a character from Tutuola, an efulefu, an osu in your very incarnation Adeola Fayehun.
Since you missed the last inauguration, you are invited for the next inauguration in 2018 that is if you survive the crippling fuel shortages in Nigeria or if you, Adeola Fayehun, escape abduction by Boko Haram.
Dubulaizitha!
