The Sunday Mail
AS has become the norm, I pray I find you well this week and all is well in your lives. Also, it is my sincere wish and hope that these articles have been helpful, or at the very least made an impact, as we navigate this world in His name.
Pastor Tinashe Zinyemba – The Christian Youth
Unless something comes in the days to come, we will probably conclude the entire relationship series today and then shift to other things in the weeks to come. Just to recap, last week we looked at courtship vs dating, and I recently came across a statement that read; “Dating is for fun. Courting is for marriage”.
More on that a little bit later.
From last week’s instalments, we established that the key differences between dating and courtship are: the purpose of the relationship, accountability to authority, exposure to temptation and focus on God’s Kingdom. Each of the above came with an explanation, and as believers we are encouraged to choose courtship over dating as there is no biblical stand for dating.
However, the choice is yours.
When we enter into a relationship it’s important to always ask; when to start a relationship, how to conduct yourself in the relationship and how to choose a partner?
We will attempt to answer these questions in this article and again this is not conclusive but just a biblical perspective.
It goes without say that the most important decision you will ever make in your life is accepting Jesus Christ into your life but coming in a close second has to be choosing who to marry.
Yes, this is the second most important decision you’ll ever make, because it is a destiny decision. God sends someone into your life to help you and fulfil your destiny.
This decision should not be rushed, nor should one be pressured into making it as it has to be made after due consideration. You have to ensure that you are the right person for whoever it is that you want to marry or be married too. Most people have these long lists of what they are looking for without first of all looking at themselves and preparing themselves to be the best husband or wife ever. In Matthew 7vs3, Jesus encourages us to work on ourselves first before observing/judging others. You have to first of all be comfortable and happy with yourself before you try finding someone else to make you happy.
When looking for a spouse, the apostle Paul says in 2 Cor 6 vs 14 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers . . . ” and this means don’t get into relationships with people who are not Christians. Some people go to the extent of saying you must be going to the same church, but that’s not really accurate. The most importance thing is whether or not that person is a Christian or not.
What is important is that this person believes in what you believe i.e. values, principles, vision, goals, interests, etc.
Not every Christian is a candidate to be your spouse, for there are some people that will be a burden to you or vice versa. When you feel you are ready for a relationship, communicate your intention to the Lord through prayer and believe in Him to send the right people in your direction.
Usually the ladies face challenges here. My encouragement is keep believing and NEVER lower your standards or expectations.
For those who are in relationships already you should conduct yourself in a manner that makes God proud of you. There are many who are getting married as virgins and I’d like to encourage you to maintain your purity. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit 1 Cor 6 vs 19. Some churches have rules for couples that are still courting each, our advice is adhere to what your church tells you. Above all of that you must make sure that your conscience is pure before God.
Courtship has to be aimed at getting into the institution of marriage. Adam was working and could provide for the spouse that God gave him, Eve was mature and in a position to add value to what Adam was doing in the garden. In our humble opinion it’s very difficult for a school going person to be able to get into a meaningful relationship that ultimately results in a godly marriage.
That’s all, for this week. Till next time God bless.
