The Sunday Mail
Vukani Madoda: The Sharp Shooter
In the United States, the Medal of Valour is the highest decoration for bravery for public officers and is comparable to the military’s Medal of Honour. In Israel, the Medal of Valour is the highest military decoration.
You have to give Evan Mawarire the Medal of Valour!
In a week that social media were abuzz with the bravery of Ben 10 Andy Muridzo’s antics with pole dancer Beverly Sibanda, Evan jetted in to snatch the Medal of Valour from right under the musician’s nose!
In The Philippines, the Medal of Valour is the highest military honour awarded for acts of valour above and beyond the call of duty.
The medal is awarded by the President of the Philippines to members of the Armed Forces of the Philippines and allied military personnel, including recognised guerrilla forces.
A Medal of Valour awardee is entitled to lifetime monthly gratuity that is separate and distinct from any salary or pension he/she is receiving or will receive from the government.
In the United States, the Medal of Valour is the highest decoration for bravery for public officers and is comparable to the military’s Medal of Honour. In Israel, the Medal of Valour is the highest military decoration.
Recipients get several privileges such as a tax reduction and invitations to official state ceremonies.
So here is why Evan should be given the Medal of Valour.
After trading his cloth for opposition politics, Evan caused alarm and despondency in Zimbabwe for a good part of 2016. He huffed and puffed about “Hatichada” and “Hatichatya” and so on, claiming he and his followers were no longer afraid to subvert a constitutionally elected Government.
He posted subversive videos day-in day-out, lambasting the Government of the day. He tweeted, he went live on Facebook and he used every available social media platform to vent his anger on Government because he had failed to raise school fees for his daughters.
Eventually, he got the attention he was looking for and he was hauled before the courts where scores of his supporters braved the chilly weather inside and outside the courtroom, clamouring for his release.
As fate would have it, he was released on a technicality.
There were drumbeats in the opposition camp. It was as if suddenly their hero had been unleashed and all those opposed to the constitutional order came out of the woodwork rallying behind their new-found hero who seemed able to do as he pleased.
He denigrated the President, the Government, the Cabinet, he was arrested and he was released. Somehow, he pretty much looked like he had the freedom of the City of Harare. Here was one brave fellow!
A fellow who immediately capitalised on his popularity and attracted the favour the former US Ambassador to Zimbabwe Harry Thomas Jnr, who sponsored his additional demonstrations and protests against Government while his asylum visa to the US was being processed.
As law enforcement agents were trying to get their act together in order to re-arrest Evan, the pastor-cum-politician sneaked into neighbouring South Africa where he immediately became the darling the private media as he was given a pulpit to relentlessly lash out at the Government of Zimbabwe.
As his notoriety grew, and as his visa to the US was granted, he was flown to New York to continue with protests against President Mugabe and the Zanu-PF Government during the UN Summit.
He made so much noise that we began to realise that this chap was indeed singing for his supper.
Even though he faced the setback of encountering a formidable force in the mould of December 12 Movement who could see through him that all this fellow wanted was a US Green Card and nothing else, he sang himself hoarse with a motely crew on Manhattan’s unforgiving and indifferent streets.
Back home, his name began to fade. His fans began to see the light. The so-called pastor had duped them. He was only looking for a way out of his self-inflicted poverty, a way to raise school fees, and he was now living large in the US.
He imported his pregnant wife to give birth to an American citizen.
Everything was on course and looked rosy until Donald J Trump was elected the 45th President of the United States.
No sooner was Trump inaugurated did Evan begin to feel the heat. Barely two weeks after Trump’s inauguration Evan was shipped back home to either rekindle his waning opposition flame or face the music of his illegal regime change agenda.
The moment his six-month visa expired is the moment Evan required all the bravery and valour that he could muster to return to the land he so denigrated.
The moment of truth arrived when he landed at Harare International Airport.
In typical obstinate style, he immediately started posting selfies brandishing his handcuffs and claiming that he had committed no crime and that he was allowed to come back to Zimbabwe because Zimbabwe is his home.
What nerve! What cheek! What a sight! What valour! What tenacity! What gallantry!
Can someone please award him a Medal of Valour. And after the medal, give that man a Bell’s and put his name in neon lights because he rightfully deserves everything that is coming his way!
Dubulaizitha!
