The Sunday Mail
“WE’LL learn a lot this year.”
This is the catch phrase in our football world at the moment.
It looks on point, doesn’t it?
We haven’t even reached half time yet but 2015 has already given us lessons, both valuable and useless.
We count it all joy.
First, we have learnt that Cuthbert Dube, the zifa president that most of us don’t want, is a survivor, a sleek operator who appears to have mastered the art of pulling the middle finger on our football-loving nation.
We have also learnt that the Minister of Sport, Arts and Culture, Andrew Langa, is all talk.
He breathed fire a couple of weeks ago, promising that heads will roll at zifa, but to this day nothing of that sort has happened and the good minister appears to have developed amnesia.
In the meantime, Dube and his bootlicker-in-chief Jonathan Mashingaidze continue to do their thing as if this country, the one that we fought and died for, is theirs.
Very sad!
Elsewhere we have learnt that the Harare Derby is quickly diminishing in class after that Easter Monday big yawn.
Apart from Dynamos’ Oscar Machapa, there was no other player who looked willing to take the risk of becoming a villain in search of the glory that comes with being a hero of such a big game.
One got the feeling that both Harare sides were content with the 1-all stalemate.
Maybe the hastily arranged pre-season friendlies that saw DeMbare squaring up to Makepekepe thrice in four weeks contributed to the 75th Harare Derby’s anticlimax.
However, from the Harare Derby we got one good lesson and it came from Caps United coach Mark Harrison.
All along we knew that palm trees are a must during Easter, if you are a Christian.
Never did we imagine that one can actually smoke the stuff.
Well Harrison reckons How Mine coach Luke Masomere was high on palm tree when he expressed disappointment at the abandonment of his team’s match against Caps United.
The self-proclaimed Doctor of Football claimed that his team was ready to thump Makepekepe 6-0.
It’s something that caught Harrison’s attention and the Briton hit back, in spectacular style, in his post-Harare Derby interview.
“To draw with a decision like that really hurts me, but we are still unbeaten.
“Forget about the How Mine thing, we are still unbeaten. And I want to say that if the How Mine coach (Luke Masomere) thinks he can beat us (6-0), he is dreaming. He has been smoking palm tree, I think,” the Caps United mentor was quoted.
Tichadzidza zvakawanda gore rino!
Luke “Palm Tree” Masomere or Mark “Palm Tree” Harrison?
The choice is yours but someone has to be called by that tree, sorry, name.
After the palm tree lesson one is forced to imagine that a lot of palm is being rolled into joints in Zimbabwean football as some of the decisions being made defy logic.
How do you explain Caps United’s decision to hike entry fees for the Harare Derby to $5 at the very last minute?
Palm tree, I say.
How do you explain the decision by David “Yogi” Mandigora to bench Machapa, a man who just comes to the party against Caps United?
How do you explain Harrison benching Rodreck Mutuma?
How do you explain plans by some overzealous Makepekepe fans to demonstrate against Robson Sharuko because they believe the guy is reporting negatively on their team?
Palm tree, obvious.
Ohh, by the way, Robson is not VaShagare, neither is Makomborero Mutimukulu, Mike Madoda nor John Mokwetsi!
Back to business . . .
The Mighty Warriors are in action at Rufaro this afternoon and the biggest crowd puller in the capital, Dynamos DeMbare, are also doing business at Gwanzura at the same time.
How does that happen?
When the administrators puff palm tree.
The Young Warriors camp was dogged by problems until the day they left for Cameroon for today’s crucial All Africa Games qualifier, yet we have a zifa that preaches of rebuilding Zimbabwean football.
How can the future of Zimbabwean football be taken so lightly, so cheaply?
You know the answer!
And on that palm tree note, VaShagare exits the scene.
VaShagare is the founder of DeMbare DotComs and can be contacted on that Facebook page as well as the email [email protected]
