The Sunday Mail
Changing Perspectives
Rutendo Gwatidzo
HAPPY Easter holidays to you all! Journey mercies to all those travelling. Avoid drinking while driving and also observe road rules.
It is my hope that we all find time to rest, relax and refuel.
We might have different religions, doctrines and beliefs, but the Easter holidays connect us all in one way or another.
Discoveries
I usually like doing research on things that affect our day-to-day lives.
This past week, I asked 21 employees about their Easter plans.
Most male employees said they planned to drink and be merry with friends.
Most women, however, said they wanted to do thorough cleaning at home and then visit some relatives.
What piqued my interest was how culture continues to dominate our behaviour.
Growing up, I used to see men drinking beer during public holidays at the local shops.
Some would then go home inebriated after spending all the cash they had.
Others lost their money to thieves due to their drunken state.
This trend has continued unabated for years, as we often see people getting wasted during holidays and losing valuables such as mobile phones and cash.
Stop the abuse
A good number of men are known for getting carried away during holidays and causing a lot of pain to women.
Imagine a family man who goes home after spending all he had on beer and ladies of the night.
When they get home, these men expect their wives to be there for them.
For instance, there is a woman who claimed her husband was in the habit of demanding “special meals” every day. With time, the woman started to cook meat for her husband only, while the rest of the family ate “lesser meals” because they did not have enough money.
This situation went on for a long time, with the husband unaware of it as he used to get home when the family would have already eaten.
In the name of culture, tradition or religion, a significant number of men abuse women and children.
Imagine eating special food alone, having a special seat where no one else is allowed to sit and having special utensils just because you are the father!
This is what has become the norm for many families that claim to preserve our traditional culture.
Of course, a father should be honoured and treated with respect.
However, there is a difference between honour and respect versus fear and intimidation.
Organisational status
Many organisations still have leaders who are abusive in one way or another.
Their leadership style is constantly harsh.
For example, if one member of the team misses targets, then everyone may get punished for it.
There are also those who are ever shouting and teams end up not knowing when they would have done well or not. Others are intimidating and the teams are perpetually afraid of asking for anything.
They, thus, separate themselves from work, and this is how they fail to take ownership of the business.
There are many other scenarios of management styles that are not good for teams and affect productivity, teamwork and harmony.
In other words, some leaders are abusive. Some enjoy withholding resources to satisfy their egos.
Others are quick to sack employees for no valid reason.
We also have those who constantly pass negative comments on team members.
Some of the comments can be very personal and uncomfortable.
When I interviewed a good number of such managers, I discovered that many of them experienced the same from their former superiors.
Culture can be inherited intentionally or unintentionally. Without realising it, you can find yourself doing certain things.
One author once said: “We abuse land because we regard it as a commodity belonging to us. When we see land as a community to which we belong, we may begin to use it with love and respect.”
Culture speaks so loud yet so silent at the same time.
Culture is very contagious, especially that which is not good.
Whenever bad competes with good, the former has an emotional populist appeal that wins unless good men and women come out in their numbers to present and represent good.
We need to be very deliberate when addressing cultural issues.
We also need to be very practical and exemplary in our behaviour if we are leaders, knowing that whatever we do, those who follow might do in excess.
Leadership is not about wearing stern looks all the time.
Effective leadership is situational.
Only give serious looks to those who deserve them. Wear a smiling face, be polite and give encouraging words to subordinates.
Know when to do what. Many organisations have their culture statements written on the walls of their offices, on websites and social media handles.
These are the mission and value statements that we constantly see.
Sadly, when you get to interact with management or teams, the culture they present is divorced from what is written down, and, yes, that is why we need to be very intentional about culture.
General facts
We are what we repeatedly do. Let us be the change that we wish to see. The way you want to be treated is the way you ought to treat others.
Stop the abuse that may come in different forms, sometimes without you realising it.
Rutendo Gwatidzo is the managing consultant at The HUB HR Consultancy, a culture and change management organisation. She is a multi-award-winning leader as a consultant, speaker and mentor. She is also the author of the books “Born to Fight” and “Breaking the Silence”. Contact detail: 0714575805/[email protected] / Rutendo Gwatidzo official FB public page
