The Sunday Mail
Life Issues with FGK
PARENTS’ hearts are often filled with joy when they look at their offspring.
The fulfilling emotion easily outweighs frustrations they encounter in raising their children.
Being a parent is good but hard.
It is a blessing but can also be a regret.
Parents pull out all the stops for them to be able to provide for the family as well as to able to play their nurturing role.
But all of that effort will count for nothing if the parent-child relationship is not up to the mark.
In reality, parents do every hustle with the family in mind, meaning they are not living for themselves, but the children.
However, despite all the effort to make the relationship between them and the children enjoyable, the latter, in most cases, seem not bothered to appreciate or reciprocate the love.
Reason: They believe that they did not ask to be born, hence there is no need to be grateful for any of the love.
It is against this background that we need to revisit the parent-to-child relationship. This connection is instrumental in the physical, emotional and social nurturing of a child. Above all, it determines the peace a parent enjoys in life.
Unlike in the past, children nowadays can easily find replacement of the parents’ love.
How so?
Children, especially teens, tend to develop a negative attitude towards their parents as they grow.
As teens are developing physically, they are also dealing with a lot of emotional changes within their body and the way they relate with others.
Their brains will be developing during this phase. At this stage, children can even question your authority as a parent.
Not just that!
They can even question the way things are done around your home and they sometimes demand answers or explanation to some issues involving the parent.
Some even go to the extent of resenting their parents for the ostensibly negative things they learn about them through gossip.
But that is not right.
Parents are human, too, so they also make mistakes like every other person.
For instance, a single mother raising a child by herself because she was impregnated when she was still in school can be questioned by her girl child why she has the audacity of telling her to stay away from boys when she was sleeping around when she was her age?
We also have instances in which a male child being raised by a single mother gets to a point where he thinks he can no longer take instructions from a woman around the house.
This behaviour is emotionally and psychologically damaging to the single parent who is doing her best to play both mother and father roles. Children must be tolerant to their parents and they must show them love regardless of what they hear about them or how bad people say the parents are.
There is need to cement the parent-to-child bond from the early stages of the child because its foundation determines the quality of the child’s relationship to the parent throughout the child’s lifetime.
Basically, parents should treat their children as individuals and acknowledge their opinions and beliefs.
But while they play a major part in guiding their children’s beliefs and opinions, parents should also acknowledge that external factors also come into play.
By respecting a child’s view, parents, in turn, attract respect from their offspring.
Relationships are always two-way, hence all parties should be tolerant.
Children need to understand that their parents have a history that needs to be embraced.
Often it is this past experience that they use to guide the youngsters.
Equally, children need to learn to appreciate parents’ advice through obedience.
This shows your parents you prioritise them over friends, boyfriend or girlfriend.
Children must also be ready to lift burdens off their parents’ shoulders; for example, by assisting with house chores.
When the parent is an entrepreneur, show interest in their business and desire to learn through asking questions pertaining to their trade. In conclusion, it is important to note that parents are very sensitive to their children’s acts and behaviour.
Avoid doing things that upset them.
Children can never repay parents for their sacrifices; thus, the least a child can do is show gratitude for the love and support.
Quote of the Week:
Children must love their parents always.
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