The Sunday Mail
Women & Leadership
Maggie Mzumara
Apparently, there are some leadership lessons men can learn from the average woman.
According to Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, chief talent scientist at ManpowerGroup, who is a professor of business psychology at University College London and at Columbia University, men can learn quite a few critical leadership lessons from women.
First, do not beat your chest up when in actual fact you do not have much to boast about.
As Chamorro-Premuzic puts it, do not lean in when you have nothing to lean in about. There is a general call imploring women to “lean in” to qualities like assertiveness, boldness or confidence.
In men, such qualities can manifest as self-promotion, taking credit for others’ achievements and acting in aggressive ways.
Since there has never been a strong correlation between leaning in and being good at something — especially for men — a better option would be to stop falling for people who lean in when they lack the talents to back it up.
In a logical world, we would promote people into leadership roles when they are competent rather than confident, vetting them for their expertise, track record and relevant leadership competences. Generally, quite many men have the tendency to exaggerate their abilities and capabilities, as well as successes and achievements. Be real and not over toot your horn for remarkably less than you are actually capable of doing.
Know your own limitations
We live in a world that celebrates self-belief, but it is far more important to have self-awareness.
And quite often, in many men, there is a conflict between the two. For instance, awareness of your limitations (flaws and weaknesses) is incompatible with skyrocketing levels of self-belief, and the only reason to be utterly devoid of self-doubt and insecurities is delusion.
Because women by comparison are not as chest beating as men, such a humbled demeanour enables them to understand how people see them and gives them the capacity to spot gaps between where they want to be and where they actually are. People who see themselves in a more critical way than others do are better able to prepare, and that is a solid way to increase your competence and performance.
Motivate through transformation
Academic studies show that women are more likely to lead through inspiration, transforming people’s attitudes and beliefs, and aligning people with meaning and purpose.
Men on the other hand use the carrot and stick approach.
Since transformational leadership is linked to higher levels of team engagement, performance and productivity, it is a critical path to improving leaders’ performance. If men spent more time trying to win people’s hearts and souls, leading with both EQ and IQ, as opposed to leaning more on the latter and nurturing a change in beliefs rather than behaviours, they would be better leaders.
Put your people ahead of yourself
It can be quite challenging to turn a group of people into a high-performing team when your main focus is yourself. People who see leadership as a glorified career destination and individual accomplishment are too self-centred to foster their teams’ well-being and unlock their subordinates’ potential.
Imagine a person who is only interested in being a leader because they are chasing a bigger pay cheque, the corner office, a more senior title or any form of status. Clearly, they will be inherently less interested in making others better; their only goal is to be more successful themselves. Men are generally more likely, than women, to lead in a narcissistic and selfish way. If the average male leader wants to improve their performance, they would do well to adopt a less self-centred style of leadership.
Do not command, empathise
Throughout history, we have told women that they are too kind and caring to be leaders, but the notion that someone who is not kind and caring can lead effectively is at odds with reality. We are not living in medieval times. Leadership in the 21st century demands that leaders establish an emotional connection with their followers, and that is arguably the only reason to expect leaders to avoid automation. Indeed, while AI will hijack the technical and hard-skill elements of leadership, so long as we have humans at work, they will crave the validation, appreciation and empathy that only humans — not machines — can provide.
Men can learn a lot about how to do this effectively by watching and emulating women.
Focus on elevating others
Female leaders have been proven to be more likely to coach, mentor and develop their direct reports than male leaders. They are true talent agents, using feedback and direction to help people grow.
This means being less transactional and more strategic in their relationship with employees, and it also includes the openness to hire people who are better than themselves, because their egos are less likely to stand in the way. This enables them to unlock other people’s potential and promote effective co-operation on their teams. While we gravitate towards leaders who are self-focused and self-centred, the likelihood that such individuals can turn a group of people into a high-performing team is low.
Do not say you are
“humbled”, be humble
We have been asking for humble leaders but we keep gravitating towards those that are overconfident and narcissistic (generally not female).
There are well-established gender differences in humility, and they favour women. Not all women are humble, of course, but selecting leaders on humility would result in more female than male leaders. Humility is fundamentally a feminine trait. It is also one that is essential to being a great leader. Without humility it will be very hard for anyone in charge to acknowledge their mistakes, learn from experience, take into account other people’s perspectives, and be willing to change and get better.
Perhaps the issue is not that men are unwilling or unable to display it, but that we dismiss them for leadership roles when they do. This must change, for humility is a critical driver of leadership effectiveness in both men and women.
If you are a man reading this and it upsets you, such a reaction gets in the way of your learning from women what you can do to make yourself more successful. It is a reality that the average woman has more potential for leadership than the average man.
◆ Maggie Mzumara is a leadership, communication and media strategist as well as corporate trainer, who offers group trainings as well as one on one coaching in various areas of expertise. She advocates women leadership and is founder of Success in Stilettos (SiS) Seminar Series, a leadership development platform for women. Contact her on [email protected] or follow on Twitter @magsmzumara
