The Sunday Mail
Tinashe Kusema
When it comes to remakes that no one really wants to see, Paramount Pictures’ “Baywatch” certainly takes the cup.
The action-comedy stars Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Zac Efron, Alexander Daddarrio and Priyanka Chopra. It is a remake of the ’90s television series of the same name.
It follows Mitch Buchannnon (Johnson) as he juggles blooding a new crop of lifeguards into the Emerald Baywatch family and uncovering a drug ring that involves high-standing politicians and a new club owner, Victoria Leeds (Chopra).
Facing stiff opposition from the local police and his boss Don Thorpe (Rob Huebel), his task is made even harder when the latter brings in former Olympian gold medallist and bad boy Matt Brody into the family. Brody is a PR stunt to improve the company’s image, and instantly clashes with Buchannon due to his self-serving demeanour. The movie is an attempt at both action and laughs.
While I do not understand the rationale behind this remake, I do get why Paramount signed Johnson, Efron, Daddarrio and Chopra. These four represent the four main demographics of movie watchers and their on-screen appeal collectively reaches both young and old.
Unfortunately, writers Mark Swift and Damian Shannon were too lazy to submit a meaningful and well-rounded script. The story jumps all over, the action is limp and the jokes are lame.
I really am tempted to call “Baywatch” the flop of the year, but you never know what the box office will do. The TV “Baywatch” was more than just about David Hasselhoff, Carmen Electra, Yasmine Bleeth and Pamela Anderson running around in tight shorts and bikinis.
The TV “Baywatch” was really about lifeguard work, solving crimes and personal drama. The movies only saving grace is John Bass’s performance as the lovable and super funny resident tech-guy “Ronnie”.
Despite weak material, Bass shines with impeccable comic timing, command of scenes and spot-on facial and body expression. While Bass’ co-star Kelly Rohrbach as “CJ Parker” is no Anderson, she also holds her own and the two have good chemistry.
And if you do decide to watch the movie, look out for the cameos by Hasslehoff and Anderson – if you can stomach even that bit of the film.
