The Sunday Mail
Life issues with FGK
LOVE has got so many dimensions.
But for this instalment, we are going to dwell on the most common of them all — Eros love.
This is passionate or romantic love between a man and woman, which often leads to formal or informal marriage.
This type of love began in the Garden of Eden more than two thousand years ago. Men and women were made to be companions for life and that’s how it remains today.
Every person is scrambling for someone they call their own lover. God’s law states that man cannot live alone and woman cannot do without man. They need each other.
But due care is required when choosing a lover.
Love is so powerful such that even a serial murderer will ensure that their partner is safe.
Equally, a thief somewhere is stealing to sustain their lover.
In short, even those labelled as the worst beings in society are in love with someone. This then confirms beyond doubt that love is a powerful force.
However, it has brought lots of challenges to various people and societies.
This is due to the fact that couples often fall in love with each other because of the things they admire about each other. They then fail to take note of the negatives.
For instance, in modern times the fairer sex often consider the financial status, social status, looks and acquisitions of their potential partner.
On the other side, men consider facial beauty and body structure. Only a few consider character. During dating, both partners have the opportunity to discover the attributes they do not like about each other. However, some choose to ignore such things due to the immediate benefits they will be getting.
However, reality quickly strikes when they get married.
At this moment, they realise that what they had was actually infatuation masquerading as genuine love.
Positives and negatives start to be assessed on the scale. Sadly, the negatives often outweigh the positives, thereby resulting in divorce.
The reality is that most people in love have hidden motives.
If one choose a man because of his money, she will eventually discover that there is more to love and life that money can not buy.
Where a man had chosen a woman because of her looks, they will soon realise that beauty can never replace a good character.
There are a lot of considerations to be made when selecting who to give your heart to. The consequences of being in the wrong place with the wrong person are dire – the time lost, the broken hearts and the battles fought amounts to disappointments.
Matters of the heart are really sensitive. Many are in prison because of love. Others have been to strange places seeking love portions in order to win over someone’s heart or harm rivals chosen over them.
Talk of gruesome competition!
Some have been lied to, were sacrificed on the love-bed and ended up contracting diseases.Love is not really what it looks like from the outside, instead it should be what the person intends to do with your life.
Therefore, love has to be relative.
Who is that person saying they love you? What do they mean by those words? Does their understanding of love mean sex, exploitation and subordination?
Loving a person is giving your life to them. It is exposing your vulnerabilities to someone whom you just met or whom you are getting to know.
The sad thing is that you might not get to know the person well before you open the door for them. But in engaging in love, in opening your heart to the one you love, be very careful and cautious.
Many have fallen victim to people they loved due to a number of misdemeanours, domestic violence for example, while others were dumped after being impregnated.
In conclusion, I emphasise the need to get to know your potential lover before committing to him or her.
There is a difference between being in a relationship and being in love. You must be able to be in a relationship, but without being in love.
It’s difficult, but that way your faculties are able to make sound decisions.
Do not be afraid to stay single when you have not yet found the right person. Time-pushers are not good. They will only do harm to you as they keep potential candidates away.
Quote of the week:
There is more to love, but there is also more to choosing who to love.
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