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What makes a marriage tick?

30 Jun, 2020 - 11:06 0 Views
What makes a marriage tick? Closeup of groom placing a wedding ring on the brides hand. Couple exchanging wedding rings during a wedding ceremony outdoors.

The Sunday Mail

“MARRIAGE does not just work on its own, marriage requires support for it to work, it must be spiritually supported, financially supported, emotionally supported, relationally supported, mentally supported, and physically supported,” that is the message by Pastor Batsi from Celebration Ministries.

Many times we think that as long as there is money everything will be alright but celebrities with their monies are divorcing. How can things go wrong for billionaires like Elon Musk? Or rich actors like Brad Pitt? If it was all about money, rich people would not divorce and would not fail in relationships.

A friend of mine married a wife who didn’t want to give him his conjugal rights yet she wanted everything to be normal. She was always giving excuses. She was good in other areas for she was a great cook and a very religious woman.

Instead of forcing himself on her, he started going out after other women. He went on to have an illicit relationship that evolved into a secret marriage.

His wife found out about this affair and was heart-broken. A family gathering was called to address the issue. When my friend was called to explain why he decided to have another marriage, he was quite open.

“She doesn’t want to give me my conjugal rights, I have tried since we got married but it seems like I was always forcing her.”

The gathering was shocked and the elders couldn’t make a judgement. The problem was more complex than what everyone thought. Though everything seemed fine, at least for an outsider, things were not so rosy in the matrimonial home.

The wife didn’t think sex was so important an issue so as to drive her husband to end up having another woman.

For a marriage to work, there should be a combination of all the supporting pillars. There should be spiritual support, relational support, physical support and financial support.

A marriage that is strong in one pillar can fail if other pillars are neglected.

Brian Matsaira is a love and relationships coach and can be contacted on [email protected]

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