The Sunday Mail
Life Issues with FGK
COUPLES must regularly visit the round table to iron out issues — discuss the past, present and future of the business called marriage.
Many couples in marriage do not acknowledge financial discussions as business and that is why they only bring up money issues when an argument arise. This then attracts a negative reaction and tantrums from the other party.
Married people believe in getting relationship advice on any other issue within their marriage, but they neglect seeking financial advice, yet money is the pillar that holds every union intact.
Money should be discussed in your home. Marriage being a new partnership, brings changes to a lot of things in one’s life, even from the way one used to handle their finances. It also changes one’s balance sheet for worse or for better. It is normal to feel like one does not know how to deal with their finances when newly married because both parties need to press the reset button and find new ways of handling finances.
Find your feet as soon as you can, get information on finances and discuss whatever you understand on money issues with your spouse. As part of the pledge of commitment to one another, partners declare “for richer or for poorer.”
But, it is surprising that most marriages are not surviving either the riches or poverty. We must educate ourselves when it comes to handling finances in marriage.
Poor money management skills are wreaking more havoc in marriages at an alarming scale than infidelity. We need these few tips to handle finances successfully as couples.
Firstly, you need to appoint a treasurer between the two of you.
Historically, men go out to hunt and bring their earnings to their wives at home. Wives are expected to know how much to keep and what to distribute amongst the children. Basically, this makes wives treasurers within the homes and it usually works. However, this may not be the case in all homes, some men are also good at managing finances.
It is wise for a couple to sit down and deliberate on each other’s strengths and weaknesses when it comes to money issues and spending. If you are frank with yourself, you should know that you do not qualify to be the keeper of the safe keys.
The one who has good money saving techniques should be the treasurer. Couples know each other, they know who has good spending habits.
Secondly, create a financial management discussion session as a couple. Couples need to continuously learn how to properly manage what they have. They should discuss their children’s education and welfare, religious growth and choices, sex, health and diet issues.
Therefore, financial management, an important facet of our lives which gets everything going, should also be discussed.
In this era, financial literacy is very important. We must learn the basics of financial management. Include the following in your discussions:
Income
This is how much you earn as a couple. This combines whatever you are getting from your salaries and from your businesses. When you sit down, always write down ideas of how you intend to grow your income. Write down the idea, no matter how small its contribution will be, even if it means it is adding one dollar to your income, that idea must be implemented before the next meeting.
Investment
To invest is to allocate money in the expectation of some benefit in the future. It is either buying something that will gain value tomorrow when you are selling it or it may be an asset that can pay you in form of rentals, etcetera. I have a friend who has invested in a mining air compressor that pays him at least US$100 every day in rent. An investment does not necessarily have to be a big property or stocks and bonds. Invest in simple things that both of you understand very well.
Savings
This is money you put away every time you earn. Most financial advice says save at least 10 percent of whatever you earn all the time. Currently, it might not be wise to save it in local currency, consider hard currency or items that do not depreciate in value. There can never be financial growth when there are no savings. Savings, no matter how small, will have an accumulative effect. It is also wise to put aside some money as emergency funds. It is not wise to borrow every time life throws a crisis in front of you. As a couple, discuss ways of saving money. If both of you doubt your ability to save, approach a trusted third party to keep your savings.
Expenses
This is how much we pay for the goods and services required. As a couple, you need to have the basic expenses listed down so that you may plan on how much to spend on what. Each one of you may have another allocation of money aside for their own expenses which are not included on the basic list of expenses. This helps to avoid accusations of reckless spending habits.
In conclusion, this is a basic outline of how finances should be run. Money issues are major and should be appreciated in all relationships. Anything that confuses you, conquers you. Therefore, when you do not understand money, it will destroy your marriage.
Quote of the week: Anything that confuses you, conquers you.
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