The Sunday Mail
“When you marry a woman, she must know the second one is on the way and a third wife . . .’
The above is but an ancient African proverb coined by long-departed elders on a continent where, in many of its societies, polygamy is still seen as not just a normal thing, but a good thing.
Zimbabwe has seen a gradual decrease in the number of polygamous unions owing to a blatant discouragement of the practice by mainly modern Christianity teachings that, however, do not appear to be in sync with any biblical doctrine in respect of polygamy.
According to 2 Chronicles 13:21: “But Abijah waxed mighty, and married 14 wives . . .” The verse alludes to the greatness of an Israelite king whose prowess was seen in the multitude of women that were counted as his wives.
Several other verses in the Bible conform with the traditional African practice of polygamy which traces back to antiquity and affects virtually every family lineage although the number actively involved in polygamous marriages in Zimbabwe is now estimated to have dwindled to around 10 percent.
The downturn of the practice has mainly been attributed to the influence of Western religion which, in promoting the gospel of one man one woman, has done so by ridiculing cultures that still swear allegiance to the long-tested and trusted ways of polygamy.
Polygamists argue that they are a totally different type of people who should never be confused with promiscuous people that are having an affair or affairs outside their marriages.
A Domboshawa elder, Mr Maboreke Mutsvati (74), who has three wives, said polygamy had always existed in the African culture and had proved to be a useful weapon against infidelity and disease, the very two vices it is now accused of causing.
“We know polygamy to be the best way for an African family to grow in health, prosperity and unity. Men are naturally attracted to more than one woman, so to deny a husband more than one wife is to deny him his natural instincts and he will seek to find a way out by philandering under the cover of darkness.
“This in turn will lead to problems in his household, in some cases culminating in divorce. The only trouble I run into with my wives is when I give the one more attention than the other. That stirs jealousy, but I always find ways of dealing with the situation.
“As you can see I try to make sure that I treat them equally when it comes to food and meat and we also produce more crops on our land which we supply to monogamous families who never seem to grow enough food for their own consumption,’’ said Mr Mutsvati.
Mutsvati mentions the coterie of societal ills that are now threatening Zimbabwe’s moral fabric and family order.
Prostitution is reported to have hit an all-time high in recent months and, according to Heath and Child Care Ministry statistics, the rate of STI infection in the country has seen a corresponding rise.
Only last week in Chinhoyi a university student gave birth in private and killed the baby instantly because its father had denied paternal responsibility.
Social historians say prostitution was not as rife in the past as it is now and any young women who had not found an age mate to marry by the end of their adolescence were soon snapped up by already betrothed men seeking to expand their families.
While prohibited under Zimbabwe’s civil law, polygamous marriages may still be performed under the nation’s customary law, which Government officially recognises in compliance with the Customary Marriage Act.
So-called small houses are now multiplying in number where the man is unable to marry for a second time being already registered under civil law and thus unable to perform customary marriage to a newly-beloved.
Jowere Mukusha, a philosophy lecturer in the Faculty of Social Sciences at the Great Zimbabwe University, does not give much thought to polygamy but acknowledges its existence since time immemorial.
“Polygamy is still being practised especially in remote parts of Zimbabwe as well as in independent churches linked to the apostolic sect. In most parts of the country people practise polygamy through the commonly touted small house syndrome though it is a private at times illegitimate association,’’ he says, adding:
“Of course, it can still function as a safety measure (and) in times of pandemic diseases, there is the possibility of survivors.’’
Adherents and advocates of small houses claim it is one way of reducing pressure on their legitimate wives who might ordinarily be unable to cope with the sexual appetite of their demanding husbands.
Africa is not the only staging ground for lobola multiplicity. Whereas African tradition permits any number of wives that a husband can afford to look after, the Islamic religion allows a man to have up to a maximum four wives. Muslims give several reasons why this should be allowed, the main reason being that there are more women than men in the world.
The latest census figures in Zimbabwe, in particular, confirmed that the population of women now totals more than 52 percent with the total number of men in the country now falling to below 48 percent. Therefore there are not enough men for every woman to have a husband.
Muslims also argue that monogamy is a Western idea which does not work and has led to the many divorces being seen today.
On the contrary, they teach, polygamy keeps a wife from being divorced so the husband must still provide for her.
Both Muslims and African traditionalists hold that the main purpose of marriage is not to have sex, but to procreate as was ordained by the Maker when he instructed the people to “go forth and multiply”.
Elsewhere around the world, polygamy is picking up.
There are believed to be as many as 20 000 polygamous unions in the United Kingdom – and the dating agency, Marriage Events, is credited for setting many of them up.
Studying for a PhD in engineering at Cambridge University, Nabilah Phillips might not seem like a prime candidate to enter into a polygamous marriage.
But that is what she did, dropping out of university to become the second woman married to London businessman Hasan Phillips who has since acquired a third wife, according to Marriage Events.
She said: “I was looking for someone who had been married or was already in a marriage.’’
In Canada, a government minister was recently quoted as saying that there were now “at least hundreds” of cases of people in polygamous marriages in the North American country.
President Mugabe has said there was nothing wrong with men taking several wives as long as this was done openly.
“Our Constitution allows polygamy. We will not force people into monogamous marriages. It’s there in the Bible; Solomon wasn’t only given wealth but many wives too.’’
President Mugabe also reiterated his sentiments while addressing mourners at the burial of polygamist Eric Nyakudya Gwanzura, a former construction magnate and liberation war icon, later last year.
“He (Gwanzura) fell short of having 20 children as he had 19 and 65 grandchildren. That is the life he chose. I never knew he had three wives, he kept his life private. Don’t play women as we have seen done by some elements in MDC. If you want them as your wives, just do it, it’s okay.”
Showing his well-noted humorous side, the President suggested that the family should form their own football team and call it “Gwanzura United”.
