The Sunday Mail
Natasha Mushamba, Midlands State University
To many of us, the previous year was full of challenges, faults, obstacles, pain, disappointments and even loss.
And up until today there’s yet so much to be done by you and so many expectations which rest upon you such that you are already exhausted before you have even gone through the first quarter of 2017.
You crossed over into the New Year with the baggage, mistakes from 2016 and already they have begun chewing your newly found lease on life. While others celebrate a new beginning your mind is transfixed as to what to do next. You barely know where to start because the bills, the kids, the marriage, the family, the workmates and church all want a piece of you and you feel drained, exhausted and just need a break…
You might have had a bad start to 2017 and the skeletons from 2016 are peeping into your new year but just do yourself a favor, take a deep breath just to unwind. Sit down comfortably and preferably alone and close your eyes and breathe. If the weight on your shoulders demands that you cry then let it out and pour your heart out and breathe. It’s okay and no one can judge you for that but the most important thing is to give yourself a break and take time to relax… you are not superman or cat woman and if you keep up with all this pressure you will definitely explode.
Take some time to just clear your mind, go for a jog or have a cold shower or fill the tub with bubbles and take a long bath but give yourself time to detox on all the negative energy and relax.
After taking a moment of relaxation then think what it is you want to do in this year? Reflect upon the mistakes you made in the previous year and come up with solutions that you can actually achieve. If you came into the New Year with debts then focus on paying your debts and try to live within your means to avoid repetition of huge debts.
Learn how to manage your finances and get your act together. Read more and educate yourself on the principles of saving and investment and try by all means to be faithful to your wallet and not abuse it. Learn to survive with what you have and wean yourself from the always being broke syndrome. Do something different with your finances and learn from your mistakes even if it means limiting your expenses… it is okay, it’s better to be financially okay with no debts than to be extravagant on borrowed money. Set your priorities straight.
If you were heartbroken last year and the pain still torments you in 2017, then love, it is time those tears dry up and you find healing to move on. They are no longer with you because they did not deserve you and who knows maybe you were spared the hassles of a nasty divorce and so much more. It is time you look ahead and focus on empowering yourself.
Every day we lose millions of people, even celebrities but does the world stop, NOO. So why should your world stop because of one person who could not see how special you are. You are worth far more than that and no boyfriend or girlfriend who betrayed you is worth your tears. Its time you pick yourself up and remove the dust because it will always make you sneeze.
Be the best you can be and show them what they missed out on. You do not have to stop showering and keep avoiding people and stay indoors, NOO. Go out there and create your own happiness do not search for it but create it.
Surround yourself with people who will build you, inspire you and appreciate you. Life is too short so make the most of 2017 and start afresh. It is okay to even give yourself time to be single and sort out your life. It is allowed, do not rush or jump into things because you are hurt or because you want to make them jealous. Just take a deep breath, relax and start all over again.
You went home with terrible results and you feel bad.
The whole holiday was basically about how you failed and constant reminders of your failure. But this year is your final year and you are already sweaty and clammy at the sight of past exam papers and you are worried how you are going to do this.
Just take a deep breath and relax tell yourself that this year I do not want to make the same mistake but I want to work hard. Tell yourself what you want and the results you want for yourself. Do not even be shy or afraid. Say to yourself for example, ‘I, Tasha am going to do my best and I will work hard. I am a champ and I am not a failure. I want to make something out of myself so I will work hard and not give up’… and the list goes on.
Feed yourself with positive words and have a picture of your parents in your head.
Think of their efforts and how they believe in you. Even think of all the people that think you cannot do it and aim to prove them wrong.
Do not let them believe all those hurtful things they said about you are true… work hard and try to do your best.
Put in effort and you will be rewarded. If you started on a bad note it does not mean your whole year is ruined , there is still hope and room for change that can only be implemented by you… if 2016 and all the previous years were a waste then do not let 2017 fall in that same category. Make this one count and make it worthwhile. Just breathe and start all over again and correct your mistakes. Stop running but own up to your errors and do right.
‘It only becomes too late when you become the late’… Doc Nate
A special mention and heartfelt condolence to all those who started the year with deaths and loss. It is a heartbreaking experience and a terrifying way to start a New Year.
It is my hope that you find comfort and solace in God and the word of God. People have different ways of dealing with loss and loss takes time to heal from. But take it easy and just take a deep breath. Some of you lost parents, husbands, wives, friends and relatives and you have a huge scar in your hearts but it is my hope that within such moments you surround yourself with family and close friends.
Do not keep it all in but let the pain out and all the emotions out. There is no certain remedy but love from family and friends will go a long way. Focus on the good memories and if they had dreams for example to open a dog shelter or orphanage.
It could also bring a sense of healing if you invest at times in dreams that your beloved wanted.
But above all try not to be alone but talk to someone a close friend, relative or someone who shares and understands your pain… it is my hope that the dear Lord strengthen you for your sake and the sake of your family and children that also need you.
From yours truly Doc Nate Mushamba contact me on [email protected] or Facebook Page Doc Nate… cheers
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