As we report elsewhere in this section, Big Brother Africa (Stargame) comes to a close this evening. Around 10pm that house should be empty.
To some it should come as a relief, especially myself. I am quite sure that by the time the next show comes around I would have equipped my household with a PVR — that decoder which allows different-minded members of the same family to watch what they fancy at the same time, albeit in different rooms.

Honestly, honestly I was missing my Sunday evening slot for movies on M-Net, mainly because of Big Brother. The majority of the family was for Big Brother and, given the thriving democracy that is Zimbabwe, me (being in the minority) had to endure the eviction shows every Sunday.
And when Roki and Maneta did that stupid act, and were booted out, I thought it was going to have a bearing on my family’s interest on the show and we would get a bit of life. Instead, the more they liked the show. Reason why I have resolved to borrow, steal or beg so that come the next edition of Big Brother edition, I will be watching Animal Planet instead. Wild animals can be more intriguing.

I could be the only one, or there could be several out there feeling like I do now, but truth is Big Brother has somehow lost the plot. When the reality show started out, as in the very first edition some seven or eight years ago, we were, at first, not so keen on it, probably because we had not grasped the idea, it was new to us. Then somehow over the years we warmed up to it and we couldn’t miss any day’s events.

That culminated in us having two finalists in successive years, Munyaradzi Chidzonga and Wendall Parsons, that should have helped a bit in the affinity stakes.
Then this year, when we greatly anticipated a massive show, we were hit with 30-what housemates. Now you tell me, even if you have a propensity to fall in love, you can’t with that many of housemates, they were just too many. In earlier editions, we would know all the housemates from the first ones to be evicted to the winners. This year it was a different ball game, how many still remember the first evicted housemate?

When it came into our homes, Big Brother was fighting an immorality tag, that it was largely un-African and watching it was detrimental to our moral health. Somehow that tag had vanished and we had embraced it into our social fabric, it had become that sore that you can still live with.
Granted, every year there are twists and turns to the Big Brother game, which expectedly makes it a must-watch, or are supposed to make it a must-watch. But this year’s turns and twists have been too many for viewers to keep track.

First it was the idea of being evicted on the basis of                              a lottery system, that you have just been unlucky because your name came up, you had to pack your bags. Now that’s unfair, very unfair. And the pairing system did not help matters either, as the pairs were evicted together. Whether you did wrong or right.

Like what happened to the Nigerian “fat boys” who asked to go home on account of them suffering from hypertension, both had to leave. In any case, why were they allowed into the house when they had a known history of hypertension? Or our beloved Roki, who has a history of domestic violence, why was he allowed near women?

Then there was Downville and Upville, and how crowded the former was! The place was so full of housemates such that those who came from small families could have been easily excused for losing their marbles. The place was just too crowded. Well, the Upville guys, true to their swagger lifestyle, were having a blast, being the celebs they were. Until they were joined by the “rascals” from down under.

I think what Big Brother did, in having the two different houses, was like having two editions of Big Brother at once. He could have shelved the other idea for next year, running under Celebrity Big Brother (and I could also have entered! Like I am a celebrity?). The idea of having two houses was not helped much by the failure this year by the DStv platform to allow viewers to migrate between the two houses on the same channel.

Press OK this time around failed.
Given how Maneta derided her country and fellow tribespeople in front of live television — across Africa for that matter — there have been concerns that housemates should be chosen by a country, but that takes away the excitement around the opening show. It goes without saying, though, that one does not need to be schooled in such matters, that you stand by your country, just like you do with your mom and dad, through thick and thin.

I remember sometime back when I went to Big Brother (well I was covering the event and not into the house), we would have a feel of the house for two days in the run-up to the show. It was almost like how the show is run, only that it was not on TV and I remember in one of the binge nights, we were all over the Nigerian journalist and how she defended her country: the corruption, the five-hour traffic jams, the North-South conflict, etc.

Then it moved to Zimbabwe and they wanted to know how much a loaf of bread costs — those were the days of hyper-inflation. I didn’t need anyone to tell me to defend my country, trying times as they were. I would bet if Maneta had gone into the house during that time, we would all have been shamed.

So as Prezzo, Lady May, Talia, Kyle, Keagan and Wati line up for the grand prize this evening, wish them all the best of luck. If only our Roneta had held their cool, maybe one of them could be there. Maybe, only maybe.

• garikai.mazara@zimpapers.co.zw, Facebook or Twitter @gmazara