Don’t trouble trouble ’til it troubles you

THEY call it a mystical car and they say, “Don’t trouble trouble until trouble troubles you”, but the truth of the matter is that we are in deep trouble.
SAPS has been using the same make
SAPS has been using the same make

This is now our worst nightmare. The worst nightmare for every motorist and the sweetest of dreams for our respected Zimbabwe Republic Police.

This week, all I can say is we are in trouble. I can confirm that our ZRP now has a VW Golf GTI and those that are in the know of what the GTI means to the Golf family know what trouble is.

A VW Golf GTI as a police car in Zimbabwe? Yes, it is the seventh generation 2014 GTI and I am told more are coming. ZRP has acquired the fastest VW GTI ever made.

Yes, it is the fastest VW Golf GTI ever.

This means Christmas is coming with more traffic fines, more tickets issued and there will be nowhere to run because of this addition to the ZRP fleet.

Whoever is advising the ZRP on cars deserves a bonus.

I have said this before and I will say it once again: No police force in the world is worth its salt when citizens have vehicles that outpace the police fleet.

Surely, it was high time that the police retired their face-lifted E90 BMW 335i models which use the N55 engine. The N55 BMW engine is a single-turbo 3-litre i6 that can do the 0-100km/h in just five seconds.

The interior of the 2014 VW GTI
The interior of the 2014 VW GTI

On the continent, when it comes to high performance cars in police fleets, South Africa leads the pack.

However, be that as it may, Zimbabwe — despite her economic challenges — is next to South Africa, although we tend to over-keep our good police cars. South Arica’s cop GTIs are, however, older versions. It is a car rated a non-traditional police car (“50 unlikely Police Cars”).

The GTI is one of the most-loved cars by the South African Police Services, and Dubai Police in the UAE also have some in their fleet.

The allure of the GTI is not because it is a hot hatch, but because of its capabilities.

After the BMW 335i, the VW Golf GTI will have very big shoes to fill in our police force.

The motoring paparazzi in recent reviews have touted the new VW Golf GTI as “the best GTI ever”.

It is arguably the most powerful version yet.

One thing that you cannot take away from the GTI is its handling, particularly on curves.

It is said that the man that signed off the chassis of the £82 000 Porsche 911 GT3 RS, which is claimed to have the best handling 911 ever built, was given a job by VW to work on this particular generation.

The VW Golf GTI DNA had been threatened in previous generations by a somewhat lack of power compared to rivals such as the Ford Focus ST.

You will never understand the GTI unless you appreciate what it is and what it means.

The GTI is all about performance. This GTI punches 217hp from a 2-litre turbo-charged engine. The overhauled four-cylinder turbo engine is helped by the new-generation Golf’s lighter body to propel this GTI from 0-100km/h in 6,4 seconds.

This is where ZRP’s BMW 335i beats its successor.

But our cops can beat 0-100km/h in 6,4 seconds if they know how to shift the gears of the GTI properly.

GTI’s top speed is 280km/h, but this is electronically governed to 250km/h. It is unlikely any officer will ever need to hit such speeds, though.

The seventh generation GTI comes with reinforced crankshaft bearings, modified direct fuel-injection, reduced friction, improved efficiency and an exhaust manifold integrated in the cylinder head.

It comes with standard Dynamic Chassis Contro (DCC).

The GTI allows you — at the touch of a screen — to instantly tune dampers, steering, engine, transmission, adaptive cruise control, dynamic cornering lights and air conditioning.

The GTI engine can be changed from normal to sport, and the steering as well can be changed from normal to sport.

The DCC function lets you choose from five different driving modes – Comfort, Normal, Sport, Eco and Individual.

So much for a “little” car.

A cheeky hatch with a bad attitude, “takuvara gore rino!” (We are busted!). I just hope our traffic officers won’t have a “bad attitude” like their new GTI.

In short, the VW Golf GTI is more than just a sport car.

Thumbs-up to Police Commissioner-General Augustine Chihuri and his team: that’s quite a car you have there!

Hopefully, as your resources improve, you might consider ordering the 545hp Nissan GT-R for your fleet.


Please send feedback to Augustine Moyo at [email protected]

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  • b c

    The writer’s careless ranting of, and worshiping of the VW GTI is disgusting. You speak of the car as if it is a heavenly, an out-of-this world sort of creation. The fact that it has been acquired by the police does not mean much other than that from time to time the police change their fleet as the existing ages. How then does this development become anyone’s worst nightmare? Such acquisitions are every state’s obligation. Your focus should have been more on the choice which probably has cost saving implications as the VW Golf will likely cost less to buy and not be as expensive to run as the BMW 335is and Mercedes Benz C350s currently in use. You could have drawn comparison with SA where its use you rightly mentioned, and should have emphasized that it was successfully deployed over there. Your fascination with speed and technical specifications is childish. You seem fascinated about a new car and its perceived abilities. Are you subtly praising speeding? It is common knowledge that police and similar authorities will anywhere will always have high performance vehicles. Ranting about the VW Golf GTI’s abilities is thus, frankly, not news at all.

    You have also only mentioned the BMW 335i as the vehicle currently in use but ignoring the Mercedes-Benz C350. Perhaps a little more research would help you in presenting a report with complete detail. Your article is, frankly, useless and rather childish.

  • Doufi

    Have you Mr/Ms reporter tried the DSG golf? Its not your fault, I do understand where you are coming from, a country dominated by Japanese budget cars. The car is fast, yes but in a country littered with potholes (tub holes) one can not really push this car to its maximum performmance levels. Reading motoring magazines and open your eyes to the car world.

  • Volkswagen

    Have you even heard of the Golf R????