BISHOP LAZARUS: Making a mockery of Darwinist evolution

Bishop Lazarus
COMMUNION with Bishop Lazarus

I have said before that I quite enjoy the Book of Job, in particular chapter 41.

In a previous reference to this chapter, around late August, I made a plea that my favourite tract, relating to Godai??i??s description of Leviathan, not be misread as a reference to a political character who has been similarly named by both those who love and hate him.

Again, the Bishop hopes he is not misread; this is a literal reference as part of ai??i?? I must admit ai??i?? a very un-Christ like gloating.

Allow an old preacher to quote a much-loved text at a bit of length:

ai???Can you pull in Leviathan with a fish-hook or tie down its tongue with a rope? Can you put a cord through its nose or pierce its jaw with a hook? Will it keep begging you for mercy? Will it speak to you with gentle words? Will it make an agreement with you for you to take it as your slave for life?

ai???Can you make a pet of it like a bird or put it on a leash for the young women in your house? ai??i?? Can you fill its hide with harpoons or its head with fishing spears? If you lay a hand on it, you will remember the struggle and never do it again!

ai???Any hope of subduing it is false; the mere sight of it is overpowering. No one is fierce enough to rouse itai??i??

ai???When it rises up, the mighty are terrified; they retreat before its thrashing. The sword that reaches it has no effect, nor does the spear or the dart or the javelinai??i??

ai???Nothing on earth is its equal – a creature without fear. It looks down on all that are haughty; it is king over all that are proud.ai???

Pardon my gloating. I am Bishop, and I am human. I will say my Hail Marys and do my penance.

Now to todayai??i??s sermon!

There is a song I sporadically listen to ai??i?? a soundtrack from the movie ai???The Meaning of Lifeai??? ai??i?? which carries the line: ai???Every sperm is sacred. Every sperm is great. If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate.ai???

Well, it is quite ridiculous to think of our little swimmerai??i??s that way, seeing as (I am told by an online reference) males produce around ai???525 billion sperm cells over a lifetime and shed at least one billion of them per month. A healthy adult male can release between 40 million and 1,2 billion sperm cells in a single ejaculationai???.

What this tells me is that we are all special. Think of it, out of 1,2 billion sperm cells, you are the winner.

Thatai??i??s quite an achievement!

and unfortunately that is the only notable thing many people will ever do over the course of their lives.

Letai??i??s face it, some people are walking evidence that Charles Darwin was woefully wrong in his evolution hypothesis: humanity does not necessarily get better; the best sperm doesnai??i??t always win.

By hook and by crook, by the kinds of quirks of nature that result in the births of all-rounded people who excel intellectually, athletically and culturally, sometimes the most moronic sperm cell gets to the egg first.

And the result is the bright spark who thinks that he or she ai??i?? being unimaginably corrupt and unimaginably unimaginative ai??i?? deserves to run a country.

It takes a special kind of stupid to think that merely opposing President Mugabe is enough to make one a contender for leadership. Morgan Tsvangirai has been trying that for the past 15 years, dreaming that being anti-Mugabe is sufficient grounds to be president.

And we all know that Morgan is not the sharpest tool in the shed, nor the brightest crayon in the box.

Hence the attempt to present Zanu-PF member Cde Joice Mujuru as a potential president just because she sought to undo President Mugabe is the outcome of single-digit IQs that make a mockery of our continentally-renowned education system.

Right now, opposition apparatchiks are scrambling to entice Cde Mujuru to formally join hands with Morgan in the thoughtless proposition that these two negative elements will deliver a telling blow to Zanu-PF come 2018.

It is only in mathematics that two negatives make a positive. In the world of politics, two negatives cumulatively create a huge negative.

Morgan failed to beat President Mugabe from an opposition standpoint. Cde Mujuru failed to beat President Mugabe from within.

Anyone who thinks that combining these negativities will result in a positive are hammering another nail into the coffin of Darwinist evolution.

The major reason why those without and within have failed for generations to unseat President Mugabe is that they offer no thesis.

They are an antithesis: anti-Mugabe but pro-nothing.

Ok, maybe it is a bit harsh to say they are pro-nothing. Because they are quite evidently pro-themselves as seen by the manner in which they accumulate wealth so primitively and so shamelessly that once again they prove that not all humanity today is Homo sapiens sapiens.

And to those that think President Mugabe, Amai Grace Mugabe, Cde Emmerson Mnangagwa, Cde Jonathan Moyo or Cde Saviour Kasukuwere or anyone else screwed Dr Joice Mujuru out of her ai???birthrightai???, the bottom line is that Mujuru screwed Mujuru.

Just like Simba Makoni screwed Simba Makoni, and Dumiso Dabengwa screwed Dumiso Dabengwa as a horribly unintelligent sections of the media cheered them on ai??i?? as if screwing is even a spectator sport!

The un-clever simply chose to be footnotes of political evolutionary history.

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  • OMG

    By the way do we have any ministry that takes care of religious affairs? Some Bishops perhaps need promotion!

  • Mai Mujuru

    Hahahahaha. Haven’t laughed so hard in ages. Nice one Bishop!