BISHOP LAZARUS: Mai Stop It is back, better Stop It!

BISHOP LAZARUS: Mai Stop It is back, better Stop It!

STUDENTS of political science, social studies and linguistics must be having a torrid time trying to unpack what exactly happened at Kanyemba Secondary School in Chiweshe last Friday. Itai??i??s back to basic in semiotics.

Even the politicians themselves are in wonderland trying to knit the meaning of what came out from Kanyemba while the ordinary people are just watching and wondering.

In case you didnai??i??t know dear reader, the First Lady, Dr Grace Mugabe (she says you can call her Mai Mafirakureva) has resumed her countrywide rallies and get ready for some ride. She left Kanyemba stunned, but she says this is just the beginning.

After what the First Lady said in Kanyemba with regards to Lacoste, there must be some confusion, but hey macomrades there is nothing to be confused about. Nothing at all, because Bishop Lazarus had prophesied it all on January 31, 2016. Just check The Sunday Mail edition on this day and you will see kuti haasi Magaya ega anowoneswa.

Let me rewind for the benefit of those who missed this edition. I started the sermon on this day saying: ai???IF my memory serves me well, it was George Carlin who said ai???never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.ai??? This statement came to my mind after watching the unfolding drama in Zanu-PFai??i??s Midlands Province.

ai???There is a lot of stupidity going on there and the most tragic outcome of it all is that those from that province who think are doing Vice President Mnangagwa some favours are actually doing him more harm…ai???

In my prophetic mood I continued saying: ai???The circus which is no longer funny by the way, took Bishop Lazarus to the Book of Proverbs. The book of Proverbs from Chapter 26 vs 4 upwards, deals extensively with the issue of fools.ai???

Dear reader I know you must be wondering which fools I was referring to but soon you will get the drift. But before exposing the fools, as the most understood Bishop I quickly made a short prayer to God saying: ai???Please God open my mind so that this sermon is understood in the proper context in these toxic political days of our lives.ai???

You see, I had to speak to my God because due to my frankness, I have been said to be supporting G40 and on some weeks I am said to be supporting the Lacoste faction. But the truth is, as a man of God, I have to speak the truth as preached in Proverbs 12 vs 17 which says: ai???He who speaks truth tells what is right, But a false witness, deceit.ai???

After this short prayer to God, I then continued my sermon saying: ai???Now, can someone tell me what Norest Makururu, Godwin Gomwe, Ratidzo Mukarati, Godfrey Tsenengamu and Mike Nyamutsika were doing posing for pictures wearing those t-shirts printed Lacoste? We have gotten to know that those pro-VP Mnangagwa in the Midlands province call themselves team Lacoste. Now what on earth is that? Another faction?

ai???What has happened to that one centre of power in Zanu-PF? Are these comrades not creating another Joice Mujuru scenario? If you didnai??i??t know dear reader, Joiceai??i??s people thought the deal was done for her and they became very reckless. Now where is Joice?ai???

Indeed its true and I repeat here, some people in the Midlands province were getting carried away the same way as those who fooled Joice to her political dustbin. And I continued my sermon asking these comrades a few tough questions.

I asked: ai???Why sink that low? Does VP Mnangagwa want such desperate people on his side? There is no sophistication or deep thought.

ai???Just some overzealous, overexcited and over-ambitious youths whose foolishness is unfortunately packaging VP Mnangagwa as a regional and not national leader. The VP has nothing to gain from all this. He was and he remains a shrewd politician who can stand on his own.

ai???Actually, some of us who have been watching the VP during live debates in Parliament have been charmed by his conduct ai??i?? so will the monkey business from the Midlands please stop!ai???

I am not sure whether the monkey business in the Midlands province has stopped but look now Mai Stop It, Mai Mafirakureva spoke about the same issue at Kanyemba. Unlike the mild Bishop, Mai Mafirakureva was ruthless in her warning to the Lacoste group.

She said: ai???Vanhu vari kuswera vakapfeka maT-shirts hanzi Lacoste, vaakubvunzwa kuti Lacoste inorevei hanzi iperfume. Hatizi maremaka isusu. Donai??i??t abuse mutupo waPresident. Mobuditsa vana mumapepa, because this is public knowledge we saw the pictures in the papers, vana vakapfeka maT-shirts akanzi Lacoste akaembroidwa neflag yeZimbabwe.ai???

ai??? Viagra Caps no rx, purchase lioresal. Hatidi kuabuser that flag, ine meaning yainoreva flag iyi. Letai??i??s not abuse it. Munodarirei? Kana vanhu vachikudai regai vanhu vakusarudzei. Tanga takangozvigarira isu vanaMai Mugabe isu, vanhu vakati tirimafuza nekuti tanga takanyarara. Mugoti unopiwa anyerere…

ai???Varikuita zvefactionalism ngavazvirege izvozvi…ai???Stop it forthwith! Nekuti nguva yava kukwana yekuzotaurirana chokwadi. Imbwa iripo apo handivigi mupini ndinoiponda nemupini inini.ai???

Again, I offer free advice to those who were getting carried away in the Midlands province ai??i?? there is only one centre of power in Zanu-PF and that is President Mugabe. The sooner you tear those suicidal and factional Lacoste t-shirts, the better.

Having said this, I also have words of advice to the Zanu-PF national commissar, Cde Saviour Kasukuwere because he said something that tete vemusangano should never say at Kanyemba.

ai???We are coming to the Midlands, Mashonaland East and Masvingo. You stopped women from coming to welcome the President claiming it was a Kasukuwere plot. Now we are coming for you,ai??? said Cde Kasukuwere.

The good commissar should not get carried away. Tete vemusangano does not instil fear into the people. I have preached about this before and will preach about it in future.

The First Lady did a good job whipping the Lacoste group into line and honestly people want to hear the gospel according to Mai Mafirakureva. Letai??i??s leave her to unite the party.

In these toxic political times of our lives, any other voice will be misunderstood because there is so much politicking going on.

You see, izvozvi ini this poor Bishop after this sermon will be accused of being in this or that faction. Ko kuzoti national commissar kana vataura? He will be put in all sorts of factions and I am sure, Cde Kasukuwere doesnai??i??t want that.

One centre of power means President Mugabe chete chete!

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  • Mart

    Hello there! Is that George Charamba?

    • Biggie Taapatsi

      Honestly this can’t be; even the simple language tells you it cannot be.

  • Biggie Taapatsi

    Bishop, I always looks forward to your very insightful and sober sermons every Sunday. Thanks for the frank advice to Cde kasukuwere, I hope he takes it and avoid falling into the trap of getting over-excited. The same advice also needs to be given to the good Professor. As for Amai, I hope she doesn’t become another “Centre of Power”, besides the president., if she isn’t already. I like her frank talk but I have reservations about the way she sings praises of people who clearly have goals of their own.

  • MemaZimbo

    Bishop,the center of power has spoken several times – He spoke at Vic – falls and even recently at the airport,but no one seem to respect his word anymore. How can the Kanyemba rally come two days after what we thought was a successful politiburo meeting – with such unacceptable lambasting of the VP and his tribe? Remember the VP was not elected,but appointed. Why not just remove him from that post and put the “right tribe” so that we have peace and stability in the party? Haikona kushungurudza munhu asina nemhoswa yese nemhaka yekuti muKaranga. Hatina kumbonzwa kuti vaMnangagwa vakambo pandukira vaMugabe upenyu hwavo hwese. Chiyi manje chava kuitika ichochi? Saka zvino kana zvichireva kuti wese angoita VP anofanirwa kudzingwa, ngatingorega kuva ne post iyoyo mumusangano. Vanhu vese zvovoperazve takango tarisa. Mwari ngava tiitire nyasha chokwadi.

  • ephraim

    The army should now take over the running of the nation and manage the affairs of Zimbabwe while elections are being organized. These words are prophetic

  • Biggie Taapatsi

    Am disappointed the Bishop is missing in this week’s issue of the Sunday Mail. Asi makacrossa mapaths aAmai Cde Dr Grace . .